Wednesday, December 26, 2012

{Merry Christmas}


I know this is a day late, but Merry Christmas and happy holidays everyone! I hope you all are spending this wonderful time doing something you love with the ones you love, and if you're not with family, I hope you find the love where you are.
This time of year is always nice to slow down a little, to remember to take some time for yourself, even in the midst of all the holiday parties, festivities, and running around. I am soaking up some much needed family time in the snow and doing some yoga at my favorite yoga studio in Breck. It's so nice, just to breathe a little. I feel like I've been going 90 miles an hour and I can tell my body is a little more tired than usual or perhaps this is the first time, I'm actually taking a break and not pushing it. I am one of those people that will run in the morning, ski in the afternoon and do yoga in the evening. This year, I am slowing down. Enjoying the rest and simply soaking up a little bit of everything. Wishing you all a merry holiday! I am going to try to post a little more this week. :)

Sending everyone lots of love!

image via pinterest

Thursday, December 20, 2012

In Life & Love

It's almost the end of the week, which means it is almost time for a break. I can't wait for some good quality family and friend time.

I've spent the morning traveling through some fashion blogs and videos by Garance. No matter if I work in fashion or not, it's still in my blood and my bones... I think there are some things in life, we love no matter if they are in our lives or not. I am no longer in the fashion world at all, but there is still something that draws me to it. The authenticity, or the rawness of a fashion show, ohhh how I love it. I remember the first one I ever went to. I sat there, taking everything in, and I cried, I know it probably sounds silly, but I cried because there was something so honest about it. These designers put themselves out there to be critiqued and with any creative process, often the heart and soul is involved, which means that it can be very personal. It's something that captivated me at the time, because I knew I didn't have that kind of courage then. I knew that I couldn't put myself out there like that. But, funny how life works... I may never be in the fashion world again, but even with teaching yoga, it calls for the same kind of authenticity. I think that God places people and things in our lives to help us along the way. I think that if we look back on all the things we have loved, from people to places to jobs and everything else... there is some common link. Perhaps, something we were supposed to learn, something we were supposed to get to help us along in our journey.  Sometimes we have to let things run their course, we have to let our lives and ourselves unfold. "There are all kinds of love in this world, but never the same love twice." F. Scott Fitzgerald

I like this because it's true. I have fallen in love many times over, with a city, a mountain, a sport, a place, a person... it is never the same, because as we evolve, grow and journey down the road, it is necessary to have people, places and things that teach us along the way. 

I hope you all have a very wonderful Thursday. Enjoy!

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Maitri Yoga and the birth of a logo...



Hello my dears, I hope all of you are having a great day. I finally have a logo and the website for the yoga studio is almost complete. Woohoo! As I approach, the actual opening of the studio, I can't help but feel like in many ways it is already open. I've been teaching an evening class, and with such wonderful friends and people who believe in this studio as much as I do, I am feeling an enormous amount of gratitude. My wish is that Maitri gives to others what yoga has given to me. I wrote this morning that when I stepped onto my mat in Houston, Texas, I never dreamed that it would lead me back to exactly where I started. I was born here in Fayetteville, right up the street from where Maitri Yoga studio is located. The studio itself used to be my mom's doctor's office. The doctor just happened to be the one who delivered me and as my mom has pointed out to me, I was in this space where I'm teaching yoga, before I was ever even born. Kinda weird, yes? Even if you had told me a year ago that I would be teaching yoga and living in Arkansas, I would have told you that you're nuts! But I think the universe has plans that we never could have dreamed up or imagined ourselves... and often times those plans are the biggest proof that the universe is always at work.

This yoga practice has been a gateway back to myself, back to my core and back to my roots. As humans I believe we can be really hard on ourselves. I think in all of this we somehow forget to have compassion for who we are. It's almost like we forget that we aren't meant to be perfect, much less have everything figured out, so we just start judging ourselves. This practice is one that meets you exactly where you are. It is one that met me exactly where it needed to. It didn't ask me to know exactly where my feet and hands were supposed to go on the mat, it simply called for authenticity, and the willingness to show up and I mean really show up.

The reason why I chose the name Maitri Yoga is because the word, maitri itself means loving-kindness or compassion. It simply suggests that we embrace all the parts of ourselves. The dark and the light, the happiness and the heartbreak, the fear and the courage. It's just about bringing all the parts of you together, not shaming yourself, but instead embracing it all.

It is only through our humanness and imperfection that we can connect to each other because that's where the compassion lies, that's where the heart is. Yoga is not about the perfect pose, it's about the willingness to be imperfect, to be seen, to be vulnerable and to breathe through it all, release, forgive and let go...

Ahh, and not to mention how good it feels! Yoga works on us, without even knowing it... the change is from the inside out and outside in. :)

Wishing you all a wonderful day! Just wanted to share this with you guys.

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Life Lately:





Hi everyone! Happy Tuesday! Since I missed posting Monday, I figured I would give you all a glimpse into what in the world I've been doing with my time. The top two pictures are of the yoga studio. It is coming along quite nicely! Almost every piece of furniture I have stumbled upon randomly, yet it seems to be taking on a life of its own and it knows exactly what it wants to be without me even thinking about it too much. Do you ever feel that way in life? Like things just show up, and somehow everything fits? That's kind of been how the studio has come together. The fourth picture is one inside my house. My mom painted this abstract for me and I absolutely love it and again it's a perfect fit. It is soft against my light yellow walls, but adds lots of character. The painting I like to call is "Spiritual Connectivity." She added lots of things in the painting that appear hidden, crosses, and picture of herself... but, if you look closely you can see them. My house is filled with very meaningful things to me, some have been with me since college and some things have come to me from my grandparents that have been in our family for years. We are big on that kind of stuff. :)

The last picture is of course, my sweet Addie. She is enjoying her backyard very much, often coming in with muddy feet and prancing her paws all over the place. I never stop cleaning!

I hope you all are having wonderful day/week! I can't believe it is almost time for Christmas. I still need to do my Christmas shopping. Hoping to get some done today!

Lots of love to you all! 

Friday, December 14, 2012

Joy, Hope, Peace, Believe

There are so many things in life that I find myself wondering about, and today is one filled with them. As I think about the people in CT, the families, the children, the teachers and the people in the community, I can't help to think about the world as a whole. There seems to be so much tension, so much disruption in the world today and around this time of year-- a time for giving and receiving, a time for great faith, peace, love, joy, hope and believing, it's very hard to hear of something so tragic. My heart goes out to all of those in Connecticut.

Praying this afternoon for peace, serenity and healing for the families affected, and for the world. My heart is praying for all those who are hurting, who are in pain, that their hearts may be filled with light, warmth and love.

Praying for more kindness, compassion, peace and hope.

Wishing everyone a blessed weekend. Perhaps send a blessing or a prayer out into the universe for more healing, and less pain. More love and less hate. More self love and less self-loathing. More faith and less fear.

Love to you all.
image via pinterest

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Sacramento Street's Rustic Christmas from M&G


                         

Happy Wednesday, all! I hope you guys are having a wonderful week. With Christmas wreaths up at my house and a few little decorations here and there, I am starting to feel settled into living in a new place. Which is a really, really good feeling, because as I'm starting to get a little more grounded in my home, I beginning to feel a little more grounded in every other aspect of my life as well. Finally, getting my feet on the ground. :)

This morning when I was looking through blogs, I came across this beautiful table setting on Sacramento Street. Ah, I don't know if there is anything I love more than a rustic table setting. Perhaps it's the simplicity of them... I'm not really sure. Whatever it is, I love it. Caitlin did an absolutely beautiful job. She has me sold! See some of the great items she used on Mark & Graham.

Hope you all have a lovely day!

Monday, December 10, 2012

{Happy Monday}


Happy Monday, everyone! Hoping all of you are having a great day.

It is freezing outside today, which means it's actually starting to feel like Christmas time and I am planning to kick off the week by enjoying it. I'm finally starting to feel better, after weeks of feeling somewhat off balance, off center and heavy. The heaviness for whatever reason, maybe it's been all the crying, or just simply letting go, but it feels like it is lifting off my shoulders. Which is very nice! :) I've been thinking a lot lately about giving and receiving. What I wish to give... and one thing that I've really noticed is that, we can not give unless we have been willing to receive and vice versa. I think one of the things that began to feel so heavy was the pressure of achieving, and then I realized that there is nothing to actually achieve, I'm just here to share through yoga and writing and being a friend, sister, daughter... what I have received. I used to feel really bad for ever accepting anything. Whether it be a compliment, a gift or just anything like that... it would make me uncomfortable. I didn't want to receive it. And then I read something in Yoga Journal about how it is actually an insult to others when you don't allow yourself to receive the gift that others are trying to give to you. Whether it be a smile or anything else. Kind of an interesting way to look at things, isn't it? I have never really thought about it that way before, but now it makes so much sense to me. 

Now, I think to myself that it is only in our own willingness to receive that we can really give because without receiving then we become depleted and have nothing to give. So this December, remember to allow yourself to receive. Allow yourself to soak up really wonderful things, and remember that it is in "perhaps it is in receiving that we heal others and in giving we heal ourselves." :) That quote is from Soul Soup

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Twinkle, Shine, and Open Up...


...to your life. Because you're absolutely meant to shine. We all are. So this weekend, remember in your heart that you are a child of the universe and as Marianne Williamson said, "Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” 

I know I just shared this quote a couple of weeks ago, but I don't think I can ever be reminded enough of this very thing.

Wishing you all a great Saturday. I will be rocking my ugly Christmas sweater, that I secretly love and think is kind of cute. Shh, don't tell.

image via pinterest

Friday, December 7, 2012


Wishing you all a very wonderful weekend. Don't be afraid to enjoy yourself, who you are, where you've been and where you are going...

It has been a pretty tearful time for me as probably many of you who read this blog can tell. I feel like I am staring many of my vulnerabilities in the face and I am having to make the choice... the choice to not allow my fears to take over my dreams. And I'm having to make it over and over and over again, every day. There will always be thoughts in our heads telling us that we're not enough, that we can't, but I guarantee there is another place inside of us, that calls for something greater. A little twinge or perhaps a pull at the heart, that knows we can't allow our own limited beliefs about who we are to get the best of us. I guess one of the reasons this transition has been so hard for me, is because I've never really stood up for myself before and I've definitely never really gone for it... There is some part of me that feels safer playing small and that thinks something bad is going to happen if I allow myself to be really seen. I've had my family and many other people to lean on during this process, but the only person who can really get me though this, is myself. And it isn't about anything other than, finally telling the truth, being honest, authentic, open and for once not leaving, but instead sitting here, and being okay with not knowing. Like I've mentioned before,  I think that the universe is always giving us the chance for healing. Sometimes we don't want to go there, sometimes we're not ready, sometimes we might feel that if we really looked at it, it would be all too painful, but if we never go to it, then it's always lingering and the shadow wins because without us even knowing it, it has the control. But if we go through it, grieve it, forgive ourselves, forgive others and release it then we're not so afraid of it anymore, it loses the control. Last night I was talking to my parents and my dad, who has been in recovery over a year now, told me that I should try to give it up to my higher power. My fears... of not being loved, not being enough, failure, saying too much, not saying enough... that I need to give all of that up to God, because it's too much, it's too heavy and as I wrote about yesterday it's keeping me from seeing the magic in my own life. That's what our fears do, they turn our attention away from the magic, the blessings and the miracles and we miss the moment, the beauty of it all. Throughout this week, I've found myself teaching yoga, but at the same time, not really teaching it because I've been missing the moment. And teaching yoga is my favorite thing to do and I'm missing it because I've been so worried and focused on I don't even know what. Ridiculous! This is a work in progress, this letting go thing, the surrender, the working through it... I think it takes time especially when we have allowed some of our beliefs about who we are to control us our entire lives. But we just have to keep giving our fears up to the universe and allow God to do his work, every day. Every single day.

This post was a little bit heavier than I anticipated, but that's just what came out. I never really plan what I am going to write, kinda like how I never really plan what I'm going to teach in my classes, I just kinda let whatever comes up, come up.

But, I do want to let you all know, that we often attach labels to things... good times, bad times, hard times, fun times-- I think that all times, are necessary. :) I think that what I am going through now is a very necessary part of growth... at least that is what I tell myself! As I mentioned in an earlier post, after I went to Baron's, he kept telling us that the only way out is through, and to go to the places where we have most resistance.... well, lemme' tell ya, I'm there. I'm sitting in it, and this time I'm going to hold the pose, and breath my way through it.

Lots of love to you all! 

Thursday, December 6, 2012

Quinoa Stuffed Sweet Potatoes


I love sweet potatoes. I came across this recipe the other day and wanted to share it because I'm making it tonight. It sounds so good, and easy! Click here for the recipe.

Lightening Up...



Good morning my dears. I haven't really had the chance to sit down and write you guys since the last post. I started this post yesterday, got distracted, had meetings and never really got back to the computer after that. I hope all of you are having a great week. I wanted to send many blessings to one of my best friend's who has a birthday today. I want to thank her for being such a source of support for years and years and years. I am forever grateful. 

On a different note, I've been thinking... in the midst of all of this, I've found myself trying to be the perfect yoga teacher, perfect student, perfect everything. I've been exhausting myself. And you know what? All I do is teach and write about loving all the parts of ourselves and being okay with who we are right now, but the person I often forget to give that permission to is myself. I was talking to my mom last night about just how heavy I've felt lately. Heavy heart, heavy load and I am doing this to myself.  Teaching yoga is something I love to do, but as soon as I start thinking it needs to be or look a certain way, I lose the fun. I remember when I was little, and I used to play dress up all the time, I didn't really care what the outfit looked like, I just loved putting it on. The jewels, the dresses, the purses and then I would just walk around the house in them. I remember thinking it was the best thing ever. I think sometimes it can be very easy to get wrapped up in nitty gritty. But, I also think it's very important to remember the magic. Remember the beauty and remember to have fun. 

Wishing you all a very blessed, very magical day. :)

Monday, December 3, 2012

Allowing

Hi all! Long time, no talk and I apologize! Last Saturday I went to sleep thinking about Seane Corn. Do you all know who she is? My mom and I took her yoga class in Colorado at Wanderlust and it was one of the best classes we had ever taken. We both felt like in some way she was talking to us, individually, even though there were over 300 people in the room. That was awhile ago, and I had still been thinking about it and carrying it with me. Well I woke up on Sunday and googled her schedule, and I saw that she was going to be in Dallas for the week doing a training. I called Uptown Yoga, which is where it was held, asked if they had spots, and when they said they did, I threw my mom's yoga mat in the car and headed that way. I really had no idea what to expect for the week, but I can say this now, it was more incredible than anything I ever expected. From a soul to another soul, I feel like something shifted last week. Perhaps there was some last little bit of fear that I had been holding on to-- I'm not sure. But each day that went by, I began to feel like I was processing through something in that room that kept me trapped in a limited belief. I would even catch myself wanting to prove something on my mat, and then it hit me, I've spent a lot of my life asking for approval. I've mentioned in some other blog posts, that I tend to ask for permission, but now I also realize that I have had thoughts in my head, telling me that I needed to prove myself before I could do anything. Lemme' tell you, that belief has kept me hooked in; hooked in to some pain in my past. As soon as I realized this, I began grieving. Grieving for every moment that I didn't stick up for myself, or have the courage to say what I wanted, for all the moments I was too afraid... and especially for the moments that I let things go because I felt like I didn't deserve it, wasn't worthy...

So, as you can imagine. I was falling apart. Falling apart in front of Seane Corn. Seane Corn and 80 other people. I couldn't stop it. We hadn't even gotten to the "emotional day" yet. We were just focusing on alignment. One of the guys who was helping to assist came up to me in a pose, moved my ribs, opened my chest and he said, "you're resisting to this, submit to the pose." Right there I was broken open and full out started sobbing. And not little sobs. My friend Ellen was next to me and she said when the practice was finished I had snot and tissues all over my face. Lookin' good, I'm sure.

After the day was over I was in every way, exhausted. Thank goodness for some really wonderful friends to come home to who fed me and took me to get frozen yogurt. :)

Sometimes, we hold on so much in life that we don't even notice it. Sometimes, we have to allow ourselves to grieve, to let go, and cry and I mean really cry. As humans it's almost like we're programmed to think we need to earn our worth and we carry with us pain, shame and guilt that is often passed down to us through our parents and families without even knowing it and then we have experiences on top of those that we take into our systems. Our bodies are like a blue print of what we've experienced. Our traumas are held within the tension of our muscles, and it's only in releasing that tension, that we can let go, experience it, grieve it and release it.

The next day we did chakra work, which is an entirely new blog post. It was also incredible! Less crying, but man did my whole body seem to shake. The last day we dedicated our practice to prayer. This class really sealed everything in for me. I thought about all the experiences I've had- from relationships to journeys on my own. I left the class with gratitude, gratitude for every experience, because they've all taught me something crucial for my own growth. The universe is always sending us chances to heal ourselves. If we don't get it the first time, we are sent it again and the point is not to judge it, but to use it for our own wisdom. Seane kept asking us what we're going to do with our experiences. How can we use our own journey to help heal? For me, I feel like yoga has been presented for that very reason. I feel in some way, it chose me. I think a lot of people who want to teach this practice feel very much the same way. I walked out the door, got into my car and drove back to Arkansas feeling like I had left something there and gained a new perspective, one of gratitude and acceptance.

I think that's all we're really here to do after all... use our experiences for the greater good of other people. Passing on that which came as a seed...

I am forever grateful for last week. For the people I met, the advice, the kind words and most of all the loving support and space to let go!

I just wanted to share that with all of you. I hope you guys have a blessed week, and it's back to regular posts!

image via pinterest

P.S. I am forever grateful to Chrispy for giving awesome assists all week and life lessons he probably didn't realize he was giving.

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

{Happy Thanksgiving}


Hi everyone! I just wanted to say that I wish all of you a very happy, wonderful and blessed Thanksgiving. I was thinking about what all I'm grateful for and the list runs long. Starting from the basics-- my family, my health, my friends, the health of my family, yoga :), writing-- basically, all of the things that are in my life. But, I also started thinking about the journey. The things that have brought me to where I am right now. The bumps in the road, the people along the way, because a lot of times we don't know why things happen. We often don't know why things unfold the way we do, however, I think that things are always unfolding exactly as they should. Sometimes, we just have to get out of the way and let the universe work. This time last year, was a really rough one for my family. But, I am happy to say that a lot of healing has taken place and the year turned out to be a very big blessing. Life has all sorts of twists and unexpected turns, but sometimes those twists and unexpected turns are what open us up the most, and remind us, that things are always working just as they should. So this year I am especially grateful to be sitting at the table with my dad, my mom and my brother-- it's been a long haul, and now it's time to sit down, relax and enjoy each other.

I hope all of you get to relax some over Thanksgiving. Nourish all the parts the parts of you and enjoy!

P.S. I forgot to mention how thankful I am for my pup, Addie. She is my little heart and soul-- a soulmate to the core. I am forever grateful she came into my life! We're two peas in a pod! :)

Monday, November 19, 2012

Power.


It takes a lot of courage to step into our power, to not allow for anyone or anything to dim our light. This kind of power doesn't come from our ego, it comes from our core. The core of our being, that is rooting for us. That part that says, keep going, don't give up, you're worth it-- that kind of power. It isn't overbearing, it can even be quiet and subtle, however it is very strong. To tell you the truth, I have a hard time with it. A very hard time. My whole life I have been asking permission to exist. Is it okay if I do this? Live here? Date him? And now I am finding it even harder when it comes to starting a business. When we begin to step into ourselves and really start living our lives for who we are... there is often resistance. Our souls are telling us to keep going, but others might be telling us to get out of their way and off their turf. I, in this case, like to retreat. I stop where I am, tell myself at this point that I'm not good enough, and I leave. It might be the situation, it might be a job or a state or even a relationship. I have done this over and over again. While I was in Dallas over the weekend, Baron talked a lot about resistance. I think he probably said it almost every other word. It didn't really hit me until yesterday, that I have been feeling resistance in every part of my body. I have been holding on, trying to keep it all together, wanting it to be right, be perfect and instead of letting go and surrendering to the resistance, I have been creating more and more. I keep wanting to get in my car and drive back to Houston. I had a wonderful little yoga community there. One that was inspiring and it's a place I will always come back to-- it's my home studio. It's the place that birthed this idea, and gave me strength to take the leap. I keep thinking, why in my right mind would I ever leave it?? Well, now that I've taken the leap, I'm finding out that I've only just begun and that for the first time, I can't give up. I can't retreat, because I believe that if we've been given something incredible, our spirit must share it because that's what were here to do-- share ourselves, our experiences, our tools of life, our breath, our thoughts and our hearts with others. Otherwise, what's the point? I've always had resistance to Arkansas. Ever since I moved away to go off to college, I never thought I would come back here. That is until things out of my control began to happen. And the more yoga I did, the more I felt a need to go back to my roots, to the place where I once disconnected, the place where I feel like I lost my power, I felt the need to come back. I guess maybe I've had to come back to get it, however, I'm not entirely sure. What I am realizing is that the places in our lives that give us the most resistance, that's where we need to go, that's where we need to be, because those are the places of growth, of healing-- deep healing. We can't run away from our pain, or we will always run away from our joy. It is only in going through the pain, the resistance, sitting there until it doesn't exist any longer, that we will be free. Because on the other side of that resistance, of that wall, that block, that thing that always seems to be holding us back from ourselves, is who we truly are. I just wanted to share this, because often times when resistance comes up, we think it's a reflection of something wrong with us, but it's actually just a chance for us to step into our power to claim ourselves, our lives and who we are...

Robert Frost says, "The only way out is through," and as I think to myself, oh shit, he's right. My mind begins to develop a plan. I think, alright I'm just going to hold my breath, close my eyes, and hopefully I'll be through it soon. That's what I've always done. Hold my breath. In yoga, we say, the minute we want to come out of a pose is when it truly begins and the minute we start holding our breath is when we need to breathe the most. So, here we go, I am going to breathe my way through this resistance and you know what? I'm going to hold the pose. I'm making a commitment to myself right now, not to run, not give up, as I said in my last post... keep going... keep going... 

So, anytime the universe begins to show you resistance, just remember that for one thing, you are not alone, and another, it's just giving you the chance to claim your power. :) Don't be afraid to say yes, to push through and most of all to shine your light no matter what. 

image via pinterest

Thursday, November 15, 2012

When nothing goes right...


Go left.

Hi all! So, yesterday, I had one of those days, where everything seemingly went wrong. I feel like I taught the worst yoga class of my life, and could not say one thing right. Everyone was going different directions, I kept saying the wrong thing, the breaths were all messed up, it was one of those classes... that has nothing to do with preparation and everything to do with fear. As I wrote about yesterday, our best moments come from being in the moment and doing what we love, well during class yesterday, my fears turned to... "I want this to be a good class." While that's great and everything, it completely took me out of what was happening in the moment and drew my attention towards something so outside of myself that I lost it-- my words, my breath, everything. My brother later in the evening, sent me a you tube video, "Boom goes the Dynamite," to make me feel better. It is pretty hilarious, but only made me feel slightly worse. Let's just say someone could have said hi to me and I would have felt worse. I was in an all out and out tailspin of beating myself up. "I'm not good enough. That was terrible. What's wrong with me. Why did I ever think I could do this?" All of these things that yoga is not, I was-- in my ego, self-centered and giving myself a really hard time, all because of one 75 minute yoga class.

I started thinking to myself about all the times I've missed moments because of being really hard on myself. All the times that I think to myself that I have to be perfect in order to be loved. Flawless. Here's the thing... This is the most vulnerable I've ever been in my life. Last night all I wanted to do was pack a bag and run, hide in a cave somewhere and I can't tell you how many times I have done just that. Not literally, :) of course, but any time I feel like my vulnerabilities are coming out or I screw up in front of people, I quit, because I think to myself how dare I make mistakes. I thought to myself last night, that I don't know if I have the courage to make mistakes in front of people. I don't know if I have the courage to fail and still be okay... and if you read yesterdays post, it is all about this very thing-- having the courage to fail.

We all have fears-- and I think last night, I realized that I have always let them win. So, today, I woke up and I thought to myself, I am not going to let one class determine who I am. I would rather be f'ing up in front of everyone than not doing something I love, just because I'm afraid.

This weekend, I am heading to Dallas for a Baron Baptiste yoga conference. I am so excited to do some good yoga, rinse everything out and release it. Yesterday, gave me a great gift, and that was the decision to keep going no matter what... It was a point of resistance and I've had to surrender to the fact that I am not perfect. I am very human with all of my mistakes, insecurities and fears, and I am sure there will be more classes, that will feel like a wash, but for this moment, I am going to choose not to give up. Yoga gave me space on my mat to not be perfect--- it has been the only place where I've ever felt like I could let whatever come up, come up. It gave me permission to be okay, exactly where I am with exactly what I have to give at this moment. I hope to give my students the same thing. A place where it doesn't matter what happens, just don't give up on yourself and who you are.

Anyway, I just wanted to share that...

I hope all of you have a really wonderful day and weekend. Just remember, if you feel like you've ever just totally f'ed something up, it doesn't define you. Keep going... Keep going...

image via pinterest :)

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Bright & Early


Hello my dears. My posts have been scattered all over the place lately, which is a reflection of how my life looks right now. However, hopefully it will start to quiet down and I'll be in a groove eventually. For now it is what it is and I'm just trying to stay present and breathe my way through it. This transition has been a very different one for me. I am used to moving, so nothing new there, but when it comes to starting a business, I have definitely been thrown out of my comfort zone and into the land of vulnerability. When things that we do are a reflection of who we are, it gives a lot of room to take criticism personally. Or start thinking, "oh my goodness, what if I fail?" People aren't always going to identify with what you're trying to create. People need different things in their lives at different times in their lives, the thing that we all have to do, is listen to ourselves. Listen to that quiet voice, our gut, the very thing that guided us to the idea in the first place, and trust it with no attachment to the outcome. Throughout my yoga teacher training we read the Bhagavad Gita, if you haven't read it yet, it is wonderful. One of the main lessons throughout the story is letting go of the fruits of your labor. "Without concern for results, perform the necessary action; surrendering all attachments, accomplish life's highest good." 

As a continuation of the same thought, in Meditations from the Mat, it says, "Consider the moments when you were most effective in your life-- that night when you could have danced forever, the test you aced, the job you finished so well. By and large, when we look back on our best efforts we realize that they occur in moments of nonattachment to results. We are doing the thing because we love the thing itself. We are in the moment without thought of the next moment... See if letting go begins to make more sense when you are not defined by the results of your actions. Imagine that your life is meant to be a dance in which you are held in the embrace of all living beings."

I really thought this was a wonderful way to look at everything we put our efforts into. It relieves the pressure we place on ourselves, and the only thing we need to do, in anything that we do is release the outcome. I actually think that when people talk about taking risks and daring to fail, it is the same thing. The only way we ever dare to fail is when we release our attachment to the outcome-- not making it a defining part of ourselves and instead just being in the moment and doing what you love.

So for today, release the outcome. Wherever you put your efforts, do your best and let it go...  :) 

images via pinterest

Sunday, November 11, 2012

Weekend Inspirations



Hello my dears, I meant to post this on Friday, but no such luck. My friend Amie came in town for the weekend for a pre-pre yoga class in the new space. It was awesome! Although the space isn't completely finished, it was fun to get in there and do some yoga. I hope all of you had a really wonderful weekend. I've been thinking a lot about nourishment lately. How we nourish ourselves from the kind of people we're around to the kind of food we eat. When we're running around, working and being busy, sometimes it's easy to get really run-down, so this week I am all about taking some time for nourishment. Whether it's sitting around doing nothing, or eating good meals, do something to nourish yourself this week. Give yourself a little tender, lovin' care and then you have it to give to others. Lots of love to you all.

P.S. This soup looks pretty delicious from a Happy, Healthy, Long Life. Check out the recipe here

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Happy Hump Day!


Hi all! I hope you're having a great week. I always resist getting political on here, however I do hope everyone took the time to exercise their right to vote!

On another note... it's Wednesday, which means it's almost the weekend! Which means that it's almost time for the first class I'll teach in the new yoga studio here in Fayetteville. I am so excited. I can't wait to get in the space. Just standing in there brings a little more grounding energy to my life, along with some light and lots of loving kindness. It's one of those spaces that gives you space... to really let go, drop what you need to drop, so you can live your life with nothing holding you back. I often say that Yoga Ananda, gave me my life, it brought me back to myself. It allowed me to go deeply inward, to cry, to laugh, to freak out, to be really messy, to not be perfect, and to most of all enjoy who I am, right now at this very moment. I didn't need to accomplish more, be more, I was already enough. I am hoping to give my students all that has been given to me, because it's changed my life. It isn't about having the perfect pose or the perfect flexible body or any flexibility at all, it's about being open to the possibility of going deep into ourselves. Exploring who we are and giving ourselves permission to not have it all together. A lot of my friends have been telling me how "bad" they are at yoga, that they might not do very well. I never really know how to respond to this, because it's just a story we tell ourselves like any other story. It doesn't have to be true, and most likely it isn't. I always tell people that if you can breathe, you can do yoga. It's just about showing up and being present-- expecting nothing more than that. It's starting where you are at this exact moment, and letting that be enough. :) I've talked a lot about my neurosis lately, my meltdowns, yoga doesn't promise a perfect life without any ups and downs or "craziness," however it does help us breathe through those moments when everything seems to be crashing down around us. It gives us space in our minds, and in our hearts to expand, to truly love, to have compassion and to let go of the fear and step into the light. With that said, I feel very blessed to have the opportunity to teach and give it to others, because it's given me more than I ever anticipated. I hope you all have a great hump day.

image via POOLGA

Monday, November 5, 2012

Another week later...


Hi all, once again it has been (almost) a full week since my last post. Once I got to Arkansas it was a little bit of a whirlwind from moving in to trying to get settled. Needless to say, it has been a little exhausting. Actually, let me rephrase not a little but a lot. I came home to my parents' house today since it is only 45 minutes away (thank goodness), and when my mom saw me she said, "You look stressed," and with that I burst into tears. It can be hard moving-- adjusting to a new place, and I haven't been on a good steady schedule in a long time, not to mention I've been buried in my boxes. Even though, I have in some ways come back home, it feels very foreign to me. I haven't lived in Arkansas since I was in high school, and even then, I was in a different town. Anyway, I've been thinking a lot lately about creating space. Creating space in my life for new things, creating space in my body, creating space between my emotions and creating space between what Arkansas used to represent and what it represents now. I love this quote from Baron Baptiste that I saw on Soul Yoga's facebook, "Ultimately, yoga is about creating space: space within your spine; space within those secret pockets of tightness; space between your muscle fibers, bones, and joints; space between your doubts and beliefs; space between your emotions and reactions; and most important, space between your ears."


I am doing an 8-week meditation class on Sundays and when I wrote my intention yesterday, I wrote about creating space. As I try to slooow down, I am very thankful for how smoothly everything has gone and very thankful for all the help I've been given along the way. From my parents to my brother to friends who have stayed with me, taken me out, invited me to things, I am extremely thankful and feel very blessed to embark on a new adventure, while hopefully creating lots of space

image via pinterest

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Update:

I've moved! I can't believe it, but at the same time everything went so smoothly it was literally as if the universe was conspiring to swiftly and briskly sweep me out of my apartment and on my way to Arkansas. My mom came in town to help me not only pack, but look high and low for some great furniture. Since I've lived in an apartment for so long, I don't even own a kitchen table. I've always either eaten standing up or on my couch. Normal, right? Eh, maybe not. However, I did find a kitchen table, thanks to Meg! And a cute, cute side table thanks to my friend Sharon. I also did some really, really wonderful yoga and soaked up everything I could. Although, the move has left us pretty exhausted, it was a really awesome few days. I hope you all had a wonderful weekend, and are having an equally great week. Many, many prayers go out to everyone on the east coast! Here are some pictures from last week, over the weekend and yesterday... 
Taken at Yoga Ananda in Houston. A studio that has enriched my life, more than I could ever express. The girls I went through my teacher training with became family. Catherine, Kate, Kelly, Emmie, Jessica, Avi, Amie, Erica, Kim and of course, Maria, I love each and every one of  you and am so thankful for all of you in my life! I can't wait for them to come visit Arkansas and visit the soon-to-be studio here!
 This table is from Blue Bird Circle. If you haven't been there and live in Houston, you should absolutely go! I got this table for 150.00.
And in the Heights, we were pointed in the direction of Heights Antiques on Yale where I picked up this table for my kitchen. I love it. I didn't get the chairs, just because they were kinda small and I have a big brother, big meaning bigger than me because I'm a 5"2 midget and can fit in any chair.
My mom had to get a picture of me in my uniform. Denim on Denim. I was pretty exhausted by this time of the day. Truck all packed! And this little one in the picture below, I think went through a range of emotions that exhausted her to the point of barely wanting to lift her head. I think she was partly scared from all the furniture moving out + mad at me for not throwing the ball for her all day. Needless to say, my mom and I ordered room service at the hotel which consisted of cheeseburgers and a chicken sandwich and the little one got at least half of both. 
We all made it safely to Arkansas and we will try to recharge before moving the furniture in on Thursday. I will keep the updates coming and I apologize for the lack of posting. Bear with me... I haven't really had time to process anything too much, but I will say, that the whole move felt very in sync. It all lined up from the perfect moving weather to finding great furniture to the awesome movers! I hope all of you had a wonderful day today! Thinking about a costume for Halloween... ideas??

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Our deepest fear...



“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
― Marianne WilliamsonReturn to Love: Reflections on the Principles of "A Course in Miracles"


I absolutely love this quote. My teacher Maria, shared it in class with us on Tuesday and I just wanted to take a moment to share it with all of you! 

Happy Thursday my dears! Let your light shine.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

One Kings Lane



Have you all heard of it? I am officially obsessed. It's pretty great when it comes to unique pieces not to mention the prices. They have new sales every day. Currently, I am trying to find some great mirrors and anything else that might add a little bit more of a modern look. I am mixing antiques + some new furniture. I love Meg's work over at LeSueur Interiors. She's lovely and awesome! I'm going for a very similar feel... and will probably have to ask her help when it comes to finding those extra pieces that really make for great accessories. Think tortoise shells, antlers, and maybe some prints... although, my family probably has enough to stock me up! Hope you all are enjoying your Tuesday. And if you're curious about One Kings Lane here is the website: https://www.onekingslane.com/

Monday, October 22, 2012

{New Homeowner}

Hi all! Happy Monday! Wow, it has been a full week since my last post and I have to tell you that I am proud to say, I am officially a homeowner. Sometimes I can't believe it. I feel very lucky and very blessed. After a lot of tears, meltdowns and indecisiveness, the day came to sign all the papers and it just felt right. Every anxiety and fear that I had melted away, and I am happy to say that I'm really excited for the next adventure. I just wanted to share with you a few pictures from last week. :)
Choosing colors is tough to do, lemme tell ya. I finally chose a really, really light yellow in the living room and dining room. I couldn't decide between that or a chic grey, but I love the warmth of light yellow.
Testing out paint colors...

 My mom is basically a pro painter. I am doing the Shewin Williams, Maison Blanche in the kitchen....
This is a tree on my street! The colors were just starting to get pretty when I left Fayetteville to head to Dallas for my friend's engagement party for the weekend. Now I'm in Houston, where I will currently soak it all in... the yoga, antique stores and hopefully by Monday, I'll be ready to rock and roll to Arkansas. I never planned on moving back to Arkansas, or opening up a yoga studio, but I think the more and more I've come back to myself, the more and more I feel drawn to my roots. I've been away from them for a long time. 8 years to be exact and in these 8 years I feel like I've come full circle. I think life pulls us away and pulls us together, giving us room to grow all the time. The thing that I've come to realize is that sometimes you don't have to leave to grow, sometimes you can stay and sometimes you can come back to the place you left with a whole new set of perspective. I hope all of you have a very happy Monday, wherever you are! And just remember that life takes us to all different places, not to change us, but I think, to make us more of ourselves; to bring us back to who we truly are and always have been. 

Monday, October 15, 2012

This Week...




... Is going to be great. All really exciting, really wonderful things going on, and I am finally closing on the house this afternoon. Yes, unfortunately we couldn't close last week, but the day is here and I'm not even too nervous about it. At least not even half as nervous as I thought I would be. I will let you all know how it goes and once it becomes official I will take pictures. :) I really like this bedroom up above, plus the elephant print, and I also wish I was this great at layering in the fall/winter. However, when I layer I typically look like I'm drowning in clothes. I hope you all have a really wonderful Monday. Over the weekend we went to Crystal Bridges. I have to say, it was pretty awesome. If you haven't been yet, and you are in the area, you should definitely check it out.

Have a great day!

images via pinterest