Wednesday, August 29, 2012

It's never too late, or too early...

Sorry for the delayed post today. It was a busy day that included a lot of yoga, good conversation and overall a lot of nourishment to my soul. :) I found this quote awhile back, and just wanted to share it with all of you. This is something I haven't really brought up on my blog, but at the age of 57 my dad has been in the process of changing his life/getting it back. He often gave away his time and his self for the expense of his own well being, and it caught up with him in a big way when he got sick in October. However, he is fully recovering and I couldn't be more proud of him. It honestly warms my heart and soul, when I hear his voice and look into his eyes, because it's as if the weight of the world has been lifted off of his shoulders. I have my dad back, and I'm getting to know him all over again. We have a little bit of a different relationship now, because so much has changed, including his mindset, although, I truly believe at the core of him, that this is who he has always been. He just as my mom says, "fell off the turnip truck." I think that when you start trying to figure out your life, you have the list, and then you have what your parents want, and then if you have kids and spouses, that piles on even more to the list, because you start trying to make them happy. From my point of view my dad was the provider and he did his job very well, only to the expense of his own life. He forgot himself somewhere along the way, but thankfully he was able to go back, slow down... and he was willing to become broken open. When I look at him now, it is as if the shell that surrounded him has fallen away. All the pieces that used to "hold him together," all the masks are gone and in his eyes, I see his soul. It's really, really nice when you can see people and I mean "really" see them. I know because, I feel like I used to be very much the same way. I was covered and hidden in a shell. I didn't want anyone to actually see me, because I was too afraid, too afraid to be vulnerable. But slowly, the layers have shed, the shell has been broken open and I can relate to my dad so much, because it is almost like a new beginning. Anyway, I just wanted to share with you guys another little piece of myself and I thought this was a great reminder that it's never too late or too early to be whoever you want to be. I used to think my family was pretty perfect, until that notion all came shattering down around me. But I've decided that truth, honesty, vulnerability and an open heart is all so much better than any sort of "perfection," because at least this is real.

I hope you all had a wonderful day and wonderful evening!
Lots of love

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